Topic is Sleeping.
freetogonow (original poster member #57821) posted at 10:40 PM on Sunday, February 13th, 2022
What a glorious day.
I worked like a dog this past week and it’s so nice to have a day of rest where I do nothing.
I got home from church, rebooted the laundry, made a smoothie.
I’m about to watch a Bradley cooper movie.
No disappointing mediocre Sunday afternoon sex.
No having to listen to him whine that he’s bored and wants me to entertain him (there’s a big difference between someone who loves you and wants to spend time with you, and someone who is bored and wants you to take on responsibility for entertaining him).
It’s pure bliss, kids. Pure, pure bliss. Just peace and quiet and my autonomy and dignity.
This is the last weekend I’ll be tethered to this jackass. My divorce is final in less than a week. I cannot, CANNOT believe I made it.
leafields ( Guide #63517) posted at 5:21 AM on Monday, February 14th, 2022
My kids were over and we enjoyed watching the Superbowl. Watching with XWH could be excruciating because his team has to win with a blowout.
The peace is so worth it.
BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21
OwningItNow ( member #52288) posted at 10:01 AM on Monday, February 14th, 2022
Freetogonow, you are an entirely different person than when you got here. I remember that there were several weeks where your stbxh was preparing to leave to be with OW, and ypu would post about just staring at him and crying, hoping he would change his mind. The tone of your posts was desperate and lost. You would talk about not being able to live without him and not knowing how you would take care of yourself. My heart ached for you, knowing how scared you were.
Who WAS that woman? Because she is long gone! The change in you is remarkable and an example of all that is possible when we learn to believe in ourselves and let the toxic go.
Enjoy your freedom!
me: BS/WS h: WS/BS
Reject the rejector. Do not reject yourself.
The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 11:10 AM on Monday, February 14th, 2022
Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 10 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.
freetogonow (original poster member #57821) posted at 3:02 PM on Monday, February 14th, 2022
Owningit—-I love you guys so much. The people from this site walked me through my darkest hour.
You have an amazing memory.
I kept thinking only one of two things can fix this. Either he change his mind and come back to me or I take my own life.
I was broken. God allowed me to be broken because He had something so much better, and not necessarily another man. He had a life free of codependency waiting for me.
It was like I was bobbing in the ocean, clinging to a piece of floating trash, thinking that gave my life meaning. When the whole time God was saying, just let go of that little piece of trash, I have a beautiful fully stocked luxury yacht waiting over here. Just let go of that trash and climb aboard!
I was not dumped. It’s that God hid my value and worth from my ex, because my ex was not part of His future plans for me.
My life today is absolutely amazing.
EllieKMAS ( member #68900) posted at 5:20 PM on Monday, February 14th, 2022
Just giving you a huge hug ftgn - SOOOOOO happy for you!! Life on the other side is sure sweet, even if we were terrified of it at the beginning.
"No, it's you mothafucka, here's a list of reasons why." – Iliza Schlesinger
"The love that you lost isn't worth what it cost and in time you'll be glad that it's gone." – Linkin Park
crazyblindsided ( member #35215) posted at 7:35 PM on Monday, February 14th, 2022
It’s pure bliss, kids. Pure, pure bliss. Just peace and quiet and my autonomy and dignity.
I love this and am so happy for you! Living our best life now ;) such a great post. Life on the other side of this mess is glorious I don't know why it took me so long!
fBS/fWS(me):51 Mad-hattered after DD (2008)
XWS:53 Serial Cheater, Diagnosed NPD
DD(21) DS(18)
XWS cheated the entire M spanning 19 years
Discovered D-Days 2006,2008,2012, False R 2014
Divorced 8/8/24
HalfTime2017 ( member #64366) posted at 8:03 PM on Monday, February 14th, 2022
Awesome update Freetogo. I think you and I joined not far from each other, but I was reading on here for a while before I started to post and remember you.
May this week past by quickly so that you can fully untether your luxury yacht from that piece of shit anchor.
Shehawk ( member #68741) posted at 4:27 AM on Tuesday, February 15th, 2022
"there’s a big difference between someone who loves you and wants to spend time with you, and someone who is bored and wants you to take on responsibility for entertaining him)"
Well said!
I think the saying that comes to mind reading your update is something like "may you have fair winds and smooth sailing"
"It's a slow fade...when you give yourself away" so don't do it!
BearlyBreathing ( member #55075) posted at 2:00 AM on Thursday, February 17th, 2022
Add me to the FTGN fan club! You have risen like the goddess you are and taking control. You are a rockstar badass.
Me: BS 57 (49 on d-day)Him: *who cares ;-) *. D-Day 8/15/2016 LTA. Kinda liking my new life :-)
**horrible typist, lots of edits to correct. :-/ **
HomieAintRight ( new member #79903) posted at 5:07 AM on Friday, February 18th, 2022
Freetogonow,
You give me hope.
I kept thinking only one of two things can fix this. Either he change his mind and come back to me or I take my own life.
I have had moments like this. It is a horribly dark, lonely place. I look forward to the day where I am in the place you are now. I know there are a lot of tough, painful things ahead of me in the near future as I walk this road of D with children - this path that was chosen for me by someone else.
I was not dumped. It’s that God hid my value and worth from my ex, because my ex was not part of His future plans for me.
This is beautiful. I want to believe this for myself as well. Thank you for sharing your perspective.
Wishing you many blessings as you enjoy your amazing life!
wantnomore ( member #71871) posted at 12:20 PM on Friday, February 18th, 2022
I was not dumped. It’s that God hid my value and worth from my ex, because my ex was not part of His future plans for me.
This is pure poetry. Thank you!
Me: BH (57)Her: STBXWW (52)DDays - 9/10/01, 10/15/19, 7/3/21, 2/11/22.I'm dumb, but I do learn eventually. D started 11/11/22
Topic is Sleeping.
