TrustingIdiot2 (original poster new member #85739) posted at 3:17 PM on Friday, January 24th, 2025
My gf cheated multiple times with same guy. When I came to know even then as I loved her I wanted to give her 2nd chance, and told her to cut contact with him. She's still talking to him. So I told her I can't stay with her. Now she's keep texting me and calling me. After 3 times I caught the call. Hearing her voice crying making me weak. Please guide me how to stay strong and not take back the cheater because of momentary weakness.
[This message edited by TrustingIdiot2 at 3:21 PM, Friday, January 24th]
The1stWife ( Guide #58832) posted at 5:36 PM on Friday, January 24th, 2025
Here is an example of her behavior. Told through facts.
You were BF/GF
She cheated
You left
Then she decided she wanted you back. Reason doesn’t matter b/c if you take her back, there is a very strong possibility she will cheat again.
She only wants you NOW b/c either the other guy dumped her, she wants to play some ego game to prove to herself she has control over you but whatever the reason is, she cheated multiple times on you.
Her words and promises mean nothing.
If she doesn’t cheat on you with the same guy (if you are back together) she will find someone else.
Block her calls. Don’t talk to her. Don’t email or chat or connect.
I’m telling you this from experience. Too many of my friends married their cheating BF/GF and spent the rest of their time together with a cheating spouse.
For some reason when you take back a cheater they often just expect you will do it again and again. No matter how many times they cheat.
Survived two affairs and brink of Divorce. Happily reconciled. 11 years out from Dday. Reconciliation takes two committed people to be successful.
Chaos ( member #61031) posted at 4:35 PM on Monday, January 27th, 2025
So I told her I can't stay with her.
Good - you broke up with her. Now mean it.
She failed the girlfriend test. She is not girlfriend material and does not deserve a promotion to fiancée or spouse.
I'm sure she is very good at pushing buttons, especially yours. And she can try to call 1000 times. If you answer/respond on the 1001th time - all you have done is trained her that 1001 is the magic number.
Block her number, profile, socials, etc. NO Contact.
You dodged a bullet with this one. Don't look back.
BS-me/WH-4.5yrLTA Married 2+ decades-2 adult children. Multiple DDays w/same LAP until I told OBS 2018- Cease & Desist sent spring 2021 "Hello–My name is Chaos–You f***ed my husband-Prepare to Die!"