Alteredreality ( new member #85605) posted at 3:05 PM on Wednesday, January 29th, 2025
You know, what you said about friends rings true for my husband also. The male friends he is close to all live in other states now—he talks and texts with them frequently (his best friend lives across the country but they communicate daily) and they meet up for a golfing trip once a year. She was someone he saw in person several times per week and had lots of opportunities for close collaboration as they were working on building a business together (along with 2 other male partners but the other 2 didn’t come into the office space very often). Coupled with the fact that she had her own marriage difficulties and really fell for my husband who was giving her the attention she wasn’t getting. Then my husband has this person who he is close to anyway, and now she is openly in love and physically attracted to him—an ego boost he was sadly unable to resist. We were not connecting deeply in our own relationship and when she gave him that level of excitement and desire the rest was history. I have accepted this and realize that I can forgive him for having those feelings which puts me on the path to full forgiveness for acting on them. I’m not totally there yet, but I can certainly understand the temptation which is a start. I am not excusing any of it or saying it was ok, and I’ll never understand how he could live a whole separate life and never let me know, but at least I can start the forgiveness process.
Married 33 years, best friends for 44 years
DDay 10/26/24
He had 2 yr EA with business partner that progressed to PA over the past year.
Currently working on R but jury is still out
NumbAndBroken (original poster new member #85446) posted at 7:48 PM on Wednesday, January 29th, 2025
I think that’s the really important part. Understanding the whys and finding a way forward. It then gives you a place to start, to begin the journey of forgiveness.
It all sounds really positive and it’s great to hear you sounding in control and that you have a plan 🙏🏼
Together for 29 years
M for 24 years
2 amazing adult kids ❤️
D-Day: 5 Nov 2024
H had PA for 15 years (and then no physical contact but EA via text and phonecalls for 6 years with same OW)
Alteredreality ( new member #85605) posted at 8:23 PM on Thursday, January 30th, 2025
Just thinking of you. How are you doing today?
Married 33 years, best friends for 44 years
DDay 10/26/24
He had 2 yr EA with business partner that progressed to PA over the past year.
Currently working on R but jury is still out
