Three years out and concerned
This is my first post but I have been reading here for a little over three years since dday in February 2018. I’m a former WW and I was in a LTA for nine years on and off with a MM. Our LTA ran the typical course. We professed love for each other, snuck around and got away as much as we could, made plans for the future- all that fantasy and justification that we were hurting people because we were in “love” . In hindsight, I believe That at the time I was in it as an exit affair. I was lonely and unhappy in my marriage and rather than put in the work I wanted instant gratification and attention. The devastation that I caused to my husband and children still haunts me. Thankfully, my husband chose to forgive me and let me have the chance to be the wife that he deserves. After much individual and marriage counseling I can say that three years later we are happy. The guilt and shame still creep in, but I am doing my best to move forward and not let it cause any further pain to my family or selfish alienation from them.
After dday and for many months after, the OBS was contacting me via email and phone to curse at me. I blocked her but she continued to create new accounts. I caused her this pain and anger and I Knew right away that her pain and anger were my
Cross to bear. I haven’t had any contact from her husband . After a few months after dday her texts and calls stopped , but then a few months later started up again and since then has become a regular thing. I ignore her, and I share every bit of info with my husband, but it’s three years later and the communication has started escalating again. She has signed me up on dating apps and for spam accounts. I know it’s her because I have been able to track the IP address. I do not respond, but I don’t know how long is too long. I know the narrative that AP gave her was not accurate,. He told her the affair lasted so long because I threatened to tell her if he broke it off, which is a lie. Despite her believing that, I understand why she hates me and her anger is valid. Im no victim here. I just don’t know if I stay silent after three years when who knows how long this will continue and wheh dies it cross the line from being angry to stalking? Have any of you dealt with this from OBS?
6 comments posted: Friday, March 19th, 2021