Just found out... again

Hi

I’ve been coming here on and off for the last few months after my WH cheated last year. I suppose I’m here for some moral support over the next few weeks as it will all blow up again.

In the last few weeks I felt that gut feeling again. Something was off, not right. I was given a lot of reassurance that nothing was going on, but that, because of how I had been treating him recently (I haven't been loving) he couldn’t take things any more and didn’t know if we could be together. Bearing in mind he’s made no effort at reconciliation but wanted me to go back to usual life forgetting anything had ever happened. He said the feelings he had last year with OW were so amazing that he couldn’t go back to who he used to be. But, he wanted to stay together as a family as he loves family life and in no way wants to sell our family home or split up.

It turns out he wants it all (classic!). In the last few days he has been sloppy and I have found their messages and her underwear in his things. They have just started seeing each other again so you can imagine the cringe messages I saw.

I have carried on like nothing's happened and he doesn't know I know. He's being a great 'partner', seems very comfortable leading this double life. I feel so sad for my little boy and what he's lost.

I am getting my next steps together. I won’t be blindsided like last year. My priority is keeping my house for my child and getting rid of him. We are not married and I know he will refuse to leave the home, so I am not sure what I can do. I can’t afford the mortgage on my own.

8 comments posted: Thursday, February 13th, 2025