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Newest Member: Tangy

Just Found Out :
The Cognitive Dissonance is Real

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 leftdejected (original poster new member #85804) posted at 3:31 PM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2025

My WW confessed to me a week ago today. Before she was done confessing she gave me the line "We're just friends". She started an online relationship with him 5 years ago. Then a year ago she found a job online, applied for it, interviewed for it, and got the job. It turns out her online partner gave her the job lead and became her boss. So for a year she also lied to me about how she got the job. They regularly text each other on Whatsapp outside of work. I think she convinced herself that I would be okay with it if she confessed. Now he's been trying to coach her on how to handle me. It's so twisted.

D-Day: 2025-02-05

posts: 6   ·   registered: Feb. 9th, 2025   ·   location: Tacoma, WA
id 8861055
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Formerpeopleperson ( member #85478) posted at 5:20 PM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2025

Read the "Women’s Infidelity: Living in Limbo" books by Michele Langley. They’re available online.

Described my WW to a T.

And "Not Just Friends" by Shirley Glass.

Best wishes.

It’s never too late to live happily ever after

posts: 123   ·   registered: Nov. 21st, 2024
id 8861064
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asc1226 ( member #75363) posted at 5:26 PM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2025

If it’s not a physical affair your wayward wife is just below unicorn on the list of mythical creatures. EA + physical access = PA. And the babysitting thing in your profile? At least she’s consistent in having about as much respect for other people’s marriages that she does for yours.

That’s giving her the benefit of the doubt that she’s not lying about that being an affair also. I wouldn’t give good odds for that. You might want to contact his wife, sounds like she may have information to the contrary.

If you haven’t already check out the Healing Library here. Pay particular attention to the simplified 180. Also read the pinned posts at the top of this forum.

I make edits, words is hard

posts: 649   ·   registered: Sep. 7th, 2020
id 8861065
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leafields ( Guide #63517) posted at 5:47 PM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2025

Welcome to SI and I'm sorry that you're here. Please read the posts pinned at the top of the forum as well as those with the bull's eye icons. The Healing Library is full of resources, too.

I've read your bio, which includes a lot of relevant information to the situation. What are you wanting to do? It sounds like this may not be her first rodeo with infidelity.

BW M 34years, Dday 1: March 2018, Dday 2: August 2019, D final 2/25/21

posts: 4254   ·   registered: Apr. 21st, 2018   ·   location: Washington State
id 8861067
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gr8ful ( member #58180) posted at 8:00 PM on Wednesday, February 12th, 2025

After reading your bio, I’d serious bet $1M she went physical with this guy long ago. Bet you anything if you demanded a polygraph she’d panic and/or simply decline.

For your next relationship, have you tried penile injections like Trimix? I’ve heard they can work incredibly well in situations like yours.

Keep posting!

posts: 538   ·   registered: Apr. 6th, 2017
id 8861079
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